More Than Just A Label

I am the value I bring to you—I am a woman.

Yet, somewhere along the way, we've failed to value womanhood in our society. It's a pervasive failure—found in rich homes and poor homes, in educated circles and uneducated ones alike. What truly shocks me is how little attention is paid to a woman’s role as a nurturer - out and beyond the confines of her home. Society reduces her to what she does as a mother, daughter, wife, or sibling, measurably. I wonder how many people can see the woman and her persona beyond that screen of job and duty. That simple beauty of the state of being a woman as a nurturer and life-harborer - isn’t it overlooked? If she doesn’t cook, clean, drive, or earn, she’s marked down, scrutinized, and judged. Can’t she also not have anything more?

The paradox? ‘The tasks’—expected, demanded, and often taken for granted—become the lens through which women are seen, while the true essence of who they are, their very persona, is ignored. While there are many women who do what they do, even the most menial of things with all their heart and love, I know many women who do not have their heart in what they do in the name of obligatory duty. This most often is because she is summed down to the post of an unpaid glorified maid. Society justifies this as a noble, sacrificial role, one that is conferred on women from birth. A woman's role is not to be one that is mandatorily justified because of birth or because a family cannot afford otherwise but should be one by choice and with love.

When the essence of womanhood or the mere ‘being’ of a woman isn’t nurtured properly, society falls prey to the most insidious form of objectification. We often speak of objectification only in sensual terms, but the more common, more insidious form is seeing women as nothing more than multitasking machines. This objectification, this reduction of a woman’s worth to her utility, exists in nearly every home. The silence of a woman suffering, despite her education and capabilities, is deafening. Her fear of society’s judgment if she dares to speak out is soundingly palpable.

And what of the woman who ventures outside her home? As she steps into the world, the art of being a woman takes on new dimensions. It becomes a delicate balance of carving out her identity while navigating the countless expectations placed on her shoulders. In the workplace, she is expected to thrive and excel while often facing barriers, both spoken and unspoken, that hinder her potential. A woman’s achievements are measured against impossible standards—expected to manage her family flawlessly and climb the professional ladder with equal ease. If she stumbles or falters, she is seen as lacking. But when she succeeds, her success is often diminished as though it were merely a product of circumstance or privilege.

Society rarely acknowledges that a woman’s presence outside the home is more than just an economic contribution or status. It is an expression of her identity, her intellect, her desires, and her power. This may be paid or unpaid, rewarded or unrewarded. The art of being a woman outside the home is a testament to her resilience, her dreams, and her capacity to nurture not just her family, but her community and the world. This journey requires that her worth be recognized not just by what she does, but by the force of her spirit, her creativity, and her courage to step into spaces that may be new and unfamiliar. This journey must have no bounds other than the ones that she defines.

I remember a Mother’s Day wish that resonated deeply: “Happy Mother’s Day to all sorts of moms.” It thrilled me. Who has the right to define what sort of mother a woman should be, other than the woman herself? We speak of individuality, yet we enforce rigid rules. No child is the same, so why should all mothers and all forms of motherhood be the same? No home is the same, then how must we expect the same from all women? We judge by what we see on the surface, while the mountains of unseen debris a woman endures remain invisible. Not all women live the same story, lest we forget.

Do you have a woman in your life—a mother, sister, wife, daughter, or friend? It is time to reexamine why she is there. Is it for the instinctual chores she does, or is it for who she is? For the strength, intelligence, creativity, and love that she brings to the world. Yet, all too often, a woman's greatest critic is another woman, perpetuating the very societal norms that diminish their worth. May we find the wisdom to not spew on any woman until we have first touched her soul, for they may have stories to tell that go beyond the bounds of home and duty.

I write this not with a feminist point of view. I write this from my understanding of a woman’s perspective, from the life around me, and from the stories I have heard. Men too face a myriad of issues and definitely need an ear for theirs. But today, I speak of the quiet yet powerful art of being a woman—both within the home and far beyond its walls.